It was on this day, nine years ago that Manu tiptoed out of our lives. I had seen him earlier in the day and he was his usual self, complaining of the cold but not losing his smile. I had given him a hug promising to come and see him the next day with biscuits, his all time fav! He waved good bye as I left the room. A few hours later he simply gently moved on to light. He had asked for a glass of water and his teacher gave it to him and went on to get him a cup of tea and his beloved biscuits but by the time he came back Manu was gone. Just like everything else he did, he left our world without fuss, without a sound.

His death was a huge shock. Somehow Manu had always seemed invincible having weathered so many storms. I could not believe the news. I rushed to his side, sat beside him, stroked his brow, murmured sweet nothings hoping he would wake up and give me one of his lopsided smiles but that was not to be. His saintly soul had moved on. Only a broken shell remained. I too tiptoed out of the room knowing that no matter what, I would always carry a part of him in my heart.

Today nine years later I still feel his presence, at times I even feel that he will appear at the corner of the street mumbling to himself and breaking into his endearing smile. But reality hits hard. There will be no Manu. He has fulfilled his amazing soul plan and moved on.

You may wonder what soul plan a mentally and physically challenged soul born in abject poverty could have. Most of us would have brushed him away as yet another wretched beggar had we come across him wandering his street, dirty and half clad;  his heart rendering cries would have seemed an irritant that we may have quietened by throwing him a coin. I still do not know why I did not do just that. Maybe everything was preordained. I stopped and looked at him with my heart and my life changed forever. There was no looking back. Manu’s life mission was to set me back on the right path. He was a mirror to my soul.

My ardent desire to do something for him led to my having to set up Project Why in the very street he was born and where he was once loved but then shunned. Setting up our first outreach programme allowed us to start caring for him. Manu had a home. But this was only the beginning. Project Why would grow and expand and reach out to thousands of kids, all because of Manu. The biggest lesson Manu taught me was that no life however hopeless it may seem was futile. Every life was blessed and needed to be celebrated. Manu was the perfect example.

When Manu died, I was lost. I realised that Manu had been my guiding light and given me the strength to carry on. With him gone my feet faltered and it almost seemed as if I too had reached the end of the road but then I felt his presence and understood that to honour his life Project Why had to carry on. It has till now.

Today we are at crossroads again having lost a large chunk of funding and not knowing where to look to replace it. It would be easy to close the door and lose the key but I can feel Manu’s spirit urging me to soldier on as the light at the end of the tunnel is just a few steps away, steps that I have to take for Manu.

I will continue to honour his memory while Manu stays safe in my heart.

The many moods of Manu