by Anuradha Bakshi | Nov 17, 2007 | Uncategorized
As I walked away from the hospital ward where Utpal’s mom lay sleeping unaware of the terrible ordeal that brought her there, many whys crowded my mind. I guess we humans sometimes forget that we are mere humans as we get swayed by illusions of grandeur and hubristic ways. And when our carefully crafted plans crumble like a house of cards in front of our eyes we are lost forgetting that what is, is always the best.
As I sat and tried to come to terms with what had happened, I decided to share my angst with those who knew little Utpal. Many responded with supportive words but what truly set my mind at rest and gave immense strength was a beautiful poem that simply said:
Surrender:
i have surrendered.
i don’t make plans anymore.
and no sudden change disturbs.
i act out of my deepest desire
the petty ones’ve disappeared.
i don’t count how much i have
it is strange how much’s there.
i spend what i find in my wallet.
oddly, just enough in my purse.
feeding on meagre alms
what was once scarce
transforms to abundance
when i give imagination a chance
a particle is enough
to build the universe.
what if you did this too?
from soul search engine by al raines
by Anuradha Bakshi | Nov 14, 2007 | Uncategorized
I have never been a businesswoman and have always found economic theories as puzzling as double dutch. The only concept I could somewhat fathom was probably the supply and demand theory.
An old friend reconnected with us recently and asked whether we still needed help. He was one of those I regularly pounded with appeals for help till we somehow lost touch. He must have thought that perhaps by now we had become self sufficient! That is when the supply and demand theory sprung back into my mind after long time. In our work the demand always exceeded the supply, and how!
When we launched our new women centre barely a month ago we thought we would have a small creche, a small primary centre and a small vocational centre for women. In the span of four weeks or so the attribute small can only be ascribed to the space we have or te budget we initially made as we are flooded with children and women wanting to register and begin learning.
In our kind of work the demand will always be larger than the supply as sadly it is not easy to convince people to dip into their pockets and reach out to help others. As I said I am not an economist and maybe the rules of economics do not apply here, but I do feel that not reaching out to help others is being short sighted. A better educated and more aware population can only benefit each and everyone of us. On the other hand if the gap between the rich and poor, the have and have-nots, the privileged and underprivileged continues to widen at the rate we are seeing then all of us may have to pay a bitter price.
by Anuradha Bakshi | Nov 12, 2007 | Uncategorized
Our one of a kind mr popples spent one night at home on his way back to school after Diwali holidays with his mom at our brand new women centre. As usual he was the proverbial ray of sunshine capable of lifting any sagging mood.
As we sat in the evening watching a film on TV, my daughter asked him what he would like to be when he grew up. I want to be a pasha was his answer. Little perplexed, I set out to ask him what the word pasha meant. He looked at me with his huge eyes and simply replied: a hero!
Not satisfies with his answer I egged him on as to why he wanted to be a hero. He again looked at me, this time in an slightly exasperated way and stated what he thought should have been the obvious: because a hero never dies even when he is shot.
So said I, would you like to be a pasha doctor, or a pasha pilot. He simply replied: yes. The important thing was not to die.
Popples is just five and I wonder what not dying means to a child. Difficult to decipher for someone my age.
It is amazing how children assimilate what they see and hear and how candidly they applied it to their won lives. It thus becomes very important to ensure that the right messages and images are given to them at that tender age. Unfortunately it is not easy as today’s kids live on mind boggling diets of images way beyond our control: TV, films, advertisement and peer knowledge. And they interpret what they see in their won way. What looks candid at 5 may become dangerous at an older age.
A chilling article in a national daily reveals the lifestyle of aaj ka bachalog – today’s children – and makes us wonder as to how to stop this infernal spiral for which we are responsible. In our rush to give the best to our children we have stopped giving the essential.
Popples at 5 can want to be a pasha as he watches Bollywood heroes battle and win. What is important is to slowly redefine the word for him so that it assumes new and more relevant meaning and makes him a good human being, in other words a true pasha!
by Anuradha Bakshi | Nov 8, 2007 | Uncategorized
The recent debate of the right to privacy of a physically disabled child whose surgery was done under blinding media glare, raises a number of questions, the first one being the reason why the medical team who operated free of cost, decided to do so this way. The other question raised by an activist is far more troubling: would it have been the same if the child belonged to a rich family?
In recent times we have seen many poor children being given new leases of life following their story being aired on TV channels. We too at pwhy have been able to help many children needing costly surgeries by appealing to friends and supporters. One cannot deny the fact that people get ‘touched’ by real life stories. Thus it is easier to get help for individual cases than for wider causes. I must confess that this is something that has always disturbed me and made me uncomfortable.
It is true that we live in a world where advertisement and publicity rule the roost. Even charity is now a business. So if you want to succeed you need to play by the rules. But how does one determine the thin line that exists between what can be done and what ought not to?
The debate is endless.
We at pwhy could not have done much of what we have achieved without sharing the stories of those in need of help. The answer to the activist and her query regarding the origins of the child cannot but be yes, as it is only a poor child that would need help. In my mind what is important is the motive that underlies the need of sharing the story and above all the necessity to remain within the realm of decency. But more than that is the responsibility of ensuring the long term needs those you help.
by Anuradha Bakshi | Nov 7, 2007 | Uncategorized
I dropped by the women centre yesterday and decided to spend some time with a bunch of spirited boys who had joined the centre recently. There were about 6 or 7 of them and most of them were students of class VI of the sole government secondary school in the area.
We started talking of many things but very soon the conversation veered to their school life. As the kids talked about their school in a bantering tone, I could not stop the rising anger that welled inside me.
We never have class as there are no teachers said one, to which the other added:We just give our attendance and then leave. The principal beats children with a stick, even small children piped another kid. Yes but the gujjars beat the teachers retorted yet another.
Hearing all these candid revelations I could not imagine that what was being talked about was a school, a place of learning where tender minds were supposed to be imparted knowledge. I was unable to process the information. I needed to know more. I sat down and asked the kids to explain what actually happened in the school.
Madanpur Khader is a gujjar village and the gujjar are known for their violent ways. Over the years many gujjar families have built tenements for the ever increasing migrant population and recently a resettlement colony has also come up in the vicinity of the village. hence the local school has a mixed population of gujjars and migrants hailing from Bengal, Bihar and other places. It seems that parents of gujjar children threaten and browbeat teachers and hence teachers hardly come to school. Teachers on the other hand victimise other kids hence the beating and wielding of sticks!
The children I met want to study and above all want to go to another school. But other schools are located miles away though the lads are willing to travel by bus however admissions are not easy.
We plan to visit the school and find out what actually happens. Maybe we will need to talk to the gujjar parents too and explain to them that what they are doing is against the interest of their own children. We of course will ensure that these boys keep up with their studies.
But once again the whole question of education comes to the fore. Laws, court orders, even constitutional rights are ineffective when one looks at the reality that stares at us. And once again innocent children are the victims.
by Anuradha Bakshi | Nov 3, 2007 | Uncategorized
Our women centre is soon going to have solar energy to meet part of its requirements. Like everything else at pwhy is just happened. And again like everything else at pwhy it happened for a reason. Global warming is something we have been concerned about for a long time. But sadly till date the concern seemed more academic than real. Things are getting out of hand and it is time to act now.
One of the first step in this direction would be to try and teach children. But this is easily said than done and kids have no real role models. And most of the good habits we should be adopting seem so infra-dig. How can I walk when so many cars stand in my driveway or when I have just bought a gleaming new bike? Consumerism does not beget moderation. Even slums have more than one TV sets today!
And yet if nothing is done, our planet is sure to become unlivable.
Even a week before Diwali, Delhi skies are hazy and laden with pollutants. Shudder to think at what they will look like on that day. In spite of our best efforts to try and tell children and adults not to burst crackers on that day we know we will not be heard. Shops are full of new fireworks and shoppers a plenty. Everyone, even the most educated will partake in the festivities. For that spell of time, all resolutions will be forgotten.
is there a way out? One wonders. Maybe a diktat like the one issued by the Sikh clergy on ostentatious marriages? But who will bell the cat?
We continue to use and abuse our planet with hubristic abandon. One day Nature will retaliate as it often has and we will be left wondering what happened.
But it will be too late. We need to begin now.
