Many of you maybe wondering where my blog and I have disappeared for the past few weeks. Yes, we did go AWOL but this is because I got diagnosed with Multiple Myeloma. Suddenly the world as I knew it changed forever. It was a double whammy with Covid having taken centerstage. I shared the news on Facebook and I was overwhelmed by the outpouring of love that came my way from the four corners of the world. It gave me the will to fight and beat the beast. My life partner of more than four decades and my family took matters in their hand and soon we had a roadmap to follow.

Today I have had two chemos and have 12 more to go. Then the situation will be assessed. It is a long run.

The pain at times is excruciating. At times my brain feels muddled and mushy. I have been away from my computer for all these days. It is only today that I mustered the courage to come and sit at the computer and write a few words to all of you from Delhi with love.

For the past weeks we have been trying to ‘imagine’ what Project Why would look like post Covid 19. If and when schools ‘reopen’ it is likely to be without children or at a later stage with children sitting six feet apart, their faces masked and their eyes brimming with questions that may remain unanswered. A dystopian morrow awaits us all. Children from privileged homes will ‘return’ to school virtual or real. But this might not be the case of children from poorer homes. A large number of migrants have taken the long road home and they may or may not return. Many had children attending government schools. From past experience we know that often girls above a certain age are left in the village as they are likely to be wedded. I wonder how many girls will see their eduction come to a halt.

At present schools are resorting to ‘online’ teaching. Not an ideal situation. Eyes glued to a screen for long hours cannot be good for any child and the absence of your classmates and the energies that emanate from a regular classroom will ultimately take its toll on the mental well being of all children. School is not just about the subject taught but it is also about all the life lessons you learn along the way. Let us not forget that one of the four pillars of education according to Jacques Delors was: learning to live together. This will be scarified at the alter of Covid 19.

But let us get back to Project Why post Covid 19. I am confident that our teachers will be able to adapt to online teaching but I also know that most of our children do not have access to smartphones and Internet and have hardly any space in their overcrowded tenements. Squinting over a tiny poor quality screen will do more harm than good. Moreover parents will not be willing to pay for Internet access. And if there are more than one school going child in a family, it will be impossible for all of them to learn.

At present our 5 boarding school children are following online classes but with innumerable problems: from poor connectivity to the father needing the phone, to the smaller sibling wanting to see her favourite cartoon, it is nothing short of a nightmare. My heart goes out to them as 4 of them have Board exams in 2021.

If and when we are allowed to open Project Why we will have to find a way of supporting our children. If children are not allowed to come then it will have to be online and perhaps it is time to start exploring ways of acquiring tablets or phones for those who do not have any and also raising funds to pay for internet access. Time to review the way we were. All suggestions are welcome.

Schools are closed and are likely to remain closed. Education has never been a priority. Once again this ‘new’ normal has drawn the lines between the haves and have not. Privileged schools are running online classes and their students are busy studying. Laptops and tablets are in use with stable internet connections. There is sufficient space in privileged homes for finding a secluded spot even if there are siblings. Parents hover around to make sure that the child is studying.

For children from the underprivileged homes the story is different. An ersatz of online teaching has been put in place: a poor quality smart phone, an unstable internet connection, a tiny space shared with many where the TV blares, no parent to hover over you, WhatsApp groups where no smart phones exist and in many cases no study at all as no adult is willing to give you their phone.

Welcome to the world of education in the times of Covid 19!

Class XII 2020 children are living on a razor’s edge. Every section has one or more papers left. No one knows when these will take place and when the results will be announced and how that will affect college admissions. My heart goes out to all these kids.

No one knows when schools will reopen and what will be the ‘new’ normal then. Will children have to wears masks? Will there be fewer kids in a class and many shifts. And what about play?

Schools are the opposite of social distancing. They are a place where you share a bench, share your tiffin box, share your secrets, your dreams, your pain and your joy. How do you do that six feet apart!

And what will happen to Project Why? It was a place where you packed as many children as possible in the space you have as the motto was to help as many as possible and try never to send a child away. Here again I cannot imagine the new normal. I know we will need to reinvent ourselves but I wonder how. Education in the times of Covid 19 is indeed our biggest challenge.

Last week Jennie one of the trustees of Project Why UK wrote asking whether we were doing anything to help underprivileged families survive the Coronavirus pandemic. I told here that we had identified about 100 families who were in need of food and were providing them groceries to ensure they do not remain hungry. Each distribution cost us about  £700 and would last 15 days. She wrote back saying they would do something to raise funds for another distribution. On April 18 they launched a fund raiser to help us raise funds for another distribution by having their 7 trustees walk 500 miles over 21 days during their daily exercise.

Imagine my surprise when I received a mail on Sunday morning, the day after the fundraiser began, informing me that they had raised the whole amount in ONE DAY and had now doubled their target. I was speechless.

Project Why UK is a perfect example of the magic that Project Why can weave. The seven trustees are all volunteers and friends who came to spend some time at project Why, and carried us back in their hearts. They became staunch supporters and last year decided to formalise their support by registering Project Why UK as a charity. They have stood by us through thick and thin. I feel overwhelmed and humbled.

Thank you Jennie, Harriet, Cat, Catherine, Jon, Mahua and Viren for truly seeing with your hearts. And a big thank you to little Zephyr who ‘walked’ for Project Why on his mum’s back.  I love you all!

The fundraiser is on. Please help Project Why UK reach their new goal by donating here 

You can also donate by Paypal on this link.

Meet Project Why’s corona warriors. Seema, Dharmendra, Vijay, Sanjeet, Amit, Mithu. For the past days they have been busy organising passes, identifying needy Project Why families, procuring and packing goods and braving all odds to see that these reach the beneficiaries. In the first lot 30 families from Okhla and 70 families from Yamuna were identified and a care package delivered to each of them. It consisted of rice, flour, lentils. cooking oil and salt.

The first distribution was organised at Okhla with our one and only Seema taking the lead. The next day it was dependable Dharmendra who spearheaded the distribution in Yamuna with the help of the local police  beat officers who ensured proper social distancing.

In the meantime we received a letter from the Home Ministry asking for our help in arranging cooked meals for the homeless and daily wage workers. Kabir from Azure Hospitality and the Savitri Foundation came forward and immediately agreed to sponsor 1000 meals per day for a period of 30 days These will be distributed in Okhla from next week onwards. It will again be our corona warriors who will take the lead and ensure that this is done in the best way possible.

It is heartwarming to see how the Project Why team responded to the call. Each one of them was willing to come forward and do what was needed.

I am deeply grateful to my incredible team and to Kabir and the Savitri Foundation for rising to the occasion and am confident that we will win the war against this invisible enemy.

Last Saturday was my 68th birthday. It was a quiet affair coronavirus oblige! Normally my birthday is quite a celebration that begins early in the morning with a call from the US and a cheery message from my grandson. Then it is time to  visit as many centres of Project Why as I can. Everywhere I am greeted with flowers, balloons, cake, cards and even presents. I feel spoilt silly. The evening is a celebration at home with family and close friends. All along the day there are messages and calls from all over the world starting with New Zealand and ending with the USA.

This year would be different. It would be my first and I hope only birthday in lockdown.

However the day began at the crack of dawn with the call from my grandson who had composed a song for me. The little bloke is an expert at tearing me up as he always comes up with something that tugs at my heart. This year was no different.

After getting ready I opened my computer and was taken aback by the number of messages that were waiting for me. It seemed that everyone I knew had decided to make this day special. I was moved by the warmth of the greetings and the love that poured from them. I saw that many messages had been sent at midnight. Utpal and Kiran sent loving messages that made me tear up again. Malini even had a special post on Facebook that made me feel humbled and overwhelmed. Every volunteer, donor, virtual friend was there to greet me and send me their love and support.

The Project Why WhatsApp staff group was flooded with messages and I was touched by the number of people who had taken time to make little movies taking pictures from past Facebook posts and putting them altogether with music and song. It was heartwarming to see how savvy they were at social media. I was gobsmacked!

What I coud feel in every message was the ardent desire to see things return to normal and Project Why reemerge unscathed. That is what we all hope. That is what I hope. But the fear of this not happening looms large even if one tries to remain as optimist as possible. None of us know what the future holds.

But we need to hold on to every shred of hope. More so because I would be unable to see Project Why close. It would kill me. I pondered on this and asked myself why I felt like that and the answer came to me in the lovely post my friend Aparajita wrote for my birthday. I will simply share the last lines of her post: you are what each child, each student wants a teacher to whisper in their ears: ‘dream. I am there’.

No matter what happens. No matter how bruised and battered we are on the other side of these terrible times I still want to be able to whisper in every child’s ears: DREAM. I AM THERE.

It has been a week since we are under lockdown. We at Project Why are trying to find our new normal. The uncertainty of the future is daunting to say the least. Many questions beg for answers. How long will it last? Will things ever be the same again? Will we be able to pick up the pieces from where we left them and start again?

Project Why staff has a WhatsApp group that keeps it connected. We try and greet each other and share news about each other. It is heartwarming to see that some of our staunch supporters from other lands do also send messages on the group. Xavier has even coined the phrase United Colours of Project Why and  created an image with the flags of all the countries our friends and supporters come from. This undoubtedly give us hope.

The centre managers hold meetings on Zoom to try and plan for the future. It is nice to see them connecting and learning to use new virtual tools. They are busy upgrading their skills. Making plans also gives hope and hope is something we need to hold on to. The future looks bleak today more so as we do not know how long the crisis will be and what awaits us on the other side but to keep our sanity intact we need to remain positive. At present we must plan on getting the staff their salaries in spite of the lockdown. Many depend on them to survive.

Thanks to the internet and all virtual applications, we are able to keep in touch with donors and volunteers. This also gives a sense of hope. It is touching to see how concerned they are about Project Why.

We have no news about the Boards. This is very nerve wrecking for all the children who were hoping to complete their studies. I hope that they are able to sit for their remaining paper and get admission for higher studies. I pray 2020 is not declared a zero year!

Some teachers have created WhatsApp groups with their students and I am urging all to do the same. This is a nice way keeping in touch and sharing news and advise. This way we will also know that the children are safe and be informed of any problem that can then be taken care of.

It is very frustrating to be in my seventh decade and thus considered as high risk for the virus. I would have liked to be able to move around, find out about the children, help those in need and do something positive. But alas that is not possible. I just try and connect people to the best of my ability.

We have at least another two weeks of lockdown and maybe more. I hope and pray that we are able to flatten the curve and see the light at the end of the tunnel.

To keep going I spend a lot of time looking at old pictures and finding strength from the smiles of our beautiful children.The picture above is one of my favourites.

Will the world ever be the same again?

This is a question I ask myself every day. For the past few weeks now the corona virus has taken over our lives. It began with schools shutting down. First the primary classes, then classes which did not have exams, then all classes and to crown it all the postponement sine die of the remaining board exams. The upmarket schools swung into action and organised online classes for their students. However for the government school children, a closed school meant no learning at all, and for the primary children no midday meal! The class lines are drawn as is always the case.

With the Covid 19 crisis deepening one has no idea about what the future holds. Delhi and most of India is in complete lockdown and curfew has been imposed. Many theories are doing the rounds. Some think it will be a few weeks, others a few months before things quieten down. The peak in India is expected to come in June. Based on what has happened or is happening in other countries, the worst is still to come. I shudder to think about what will happen when the virus enters the slums. And it will unless a miracle occurs.

Many are not understanding the gravity of the situation and the necessity to remain locked up in our homes and the importance of sanitising ourselves and the environment. For the poor this is almost impossible. Water is scarce, sanitisers expensive and staying at home a chimera when home is a few square feet inhabited by many. No one knows or can even imagine what awaits us and hence the question: will the world ever be the same again?

Will the day dawn when we can pick up where we left and carry on the way we were? Will we hear the laughter of our little creche children again? Will we be greeted by the warm smiles of our special kids or the loud “Good morning Ma’am” of our primary students? Will we walk again in the different centres and see children studying? Will the board exams take place or will the likes of Utpal and Babli loose a precious year. I do not know. Actually I fear not. The virus has hijacked our lives and above all our dreams.

Will the world ever be the same again? Sadly the answer is no. This virus has redefined everything. When it decides to leave us or when we find a way to protect ourselves, the world would have changed. I hope for the better as we would have got time to ponder on our excesses and mistakes and hopefully look at things with our hearts, but the toll on the economy will be a stark reality that we would have to learn to live with.

The world as we knew it has gone forever. The battle with the corona virus will lay the foundation of the new normal that awaits us. Let us hope it will be a wiser and saner place.

The Corona Virus pandemic has undoubtedly set out new rules for us to abide by. It is redefining the way we will live. India locked itself down in an effort to contain the virus. Till date over 100 people are infected and 2 have died. To keep one’s self safe it is recommended that over and above basic hygiene rules one should practice social distancing. In this effort the Government has ordered closure of schools, colleges, malls, movie  halls etc. Big companies are asking their staff to work from home.

Today I would like to share some thoughts on social distancing and how it affects us. As my friend Damyanti wrote, social distancing is a privilege and exercising it may save lives. But many do not understand this. What we need to know is that for the young and healthy the corona virus may come and go like a flu but the same can kill someone who is aged or sick. The lady who died in Delhi contracted the virus from her son who had travelled recently. Had he self quarantined himself, his mother may have still been alive. As of now all the people infected have a travel history and belong to a certain strata of society. But how long will this last? One can easily infect a maid who comes to your house but lives in a slum. It is imperative to act responsibly.

There are many around us who cannot follow social distancing. They have to step out of their homes and go to work on daily basis or else they will starve. And should any of them be infected the results will be disastrous. It is crucial to understand this if we want to contain the virus. It is quasi impossible for anyone living in a slum to practice social distancing. People live in crowded one room tenements and so if one is infected the likelihood of others being so is very high. Maintaining high levels of hygiene is also difficult when one does not have access to water or can barely afford a hand sanitiser.

It is imperative for those who can be potential carriers to exercise extreme caution and utmost responsibility in order to prevent an exponential rise of the infection. At present we in India are at stage 2. Stage 3 would be a disaster.

In Italy they went from 4 cases to 15000 in 25 days!  This was because restrictions were not enforced in time. It is crucial we exercise self restrictions, go out as little as possible and take all suggested precautions. This is the only way to beat the virus and avoid a catastrophe.

The world is in the grip of the Cornona Virus. It has bamboozled everything. As the fear of the virus takes hold of one and all, preventive measures are taken in the hope of containing it. In Delhi all primary and pre primary schools have been closed till March 31st and thus we at Project Why have been compelled to do the same: the creche and all primary sections are shut. Only secondary classes are open with examinations going on.

One misses the presence of the younger ones, the loud singing in the creche as children learn poems and alphabets, the giggles and laughter of the primary classes. All that remains is an eerie silence in empty classrooms. The teachers try to keep busy cleaning up classrooms, competing files and assessment work but their heart is not there. Everyone misses the children.

A sense of uncertainty prevails as no one knows what the morrow holds. Will the virus spread or will it slowly die out with the coming of summer. Everyone is praying for it all to end.

My heart goes out to the children who must be totally bewildered at what is happening. With no school and no Project Why they must be lost not knowing what to do, left to roam the streets as their parents go about their daily routine. No one thinks of slum children when decisions like closing schools are taken. For them school is still a safer haven than their homes.

We just hope and pray that normal days will soon return. Till then little Astitva is the only student of the Project Why creche!

For the past week I have been down with high fever. My only connect to reality has been the TV news the better half switches on. Words and images cross the feverish mind and sit there waiting for them to be processed. Only I find almost impossible to do so as the horror of the recent riots in Delhi is incomprehensible to me. How could this have happened in a city where different communities have lived in peace and harmony? Where did the seed of hate come from and who tended to it allowing it to grow? In my feverish state I hear of schools being burnt down, of shops being destroyed, of livelihoods lost. I hear of deaths of young and old, death across the divide the blood running the same red

My febrile mind is unable to take it in and I sink back into semi consciousness.

Mercifully amidst all the violence and gore, the stones and bullets there are stories of hope, neighbour helping neighbours, a man from a community risking his life to save people from another, a tiny hospital bravely providing all the succour it can, a place of worship being saved by people of another faith, stories that restore faith, stories that prove that all is not lost.

So the question that comes to my mind is what makes certain people behave in one way and others in the exact opposite? Why are some willing to pick up stones and guns and destroy while others are eager to heal and spread love. Why are some willing to follow the mob blindly while others have the courage to stand for what is right.

The reality is scary. On Sunday night a spate of fake calls and rumours create panic in another part of the city, the one where we have centres too. Calls are made. In one locality inhabited by people of one community only,  people start gathering stones. One wonders who would be the targets. When asked by a sensible soul, they look around sheepishly. It just needed one person to show them the mirror.

What will it need to have more sensible souls around?

I think it is the education we give our children both in home and schools that will make the difference. It is easy to follow the crowd. It is hard to take the road less travelled. In order to do so we need to lead by example and teach our children values like compassion and respect for the other, we need to make them strong enough to defend what is right when the need arises. To not be afraid of standing alone when the need arises. It is sad that moral science  is no more part of the curriculum in schools. I wish someone collects all the examples of hope that occurred in the last days and share them with children in schools as that is how they will learn.

We at Project Why are committed to teach our children values like compassion and respect. We want them to believe in themselves and stand for what is right, even if they have to stand alone. It is tall order I know but there is no other choice. We are just doing what is right.

I cannot believe that in a few weeks Utpal and Babli will have finished their class XII Board Exams and that in just about two keeks Utpal will turn 18 and thus become an adult! To me they both remain the little burnt scalded one year old and the little heavily breathing four year old I lay my eyes on for the first time so many moons ago. That was when I decided or actually was guided to reach out to them and craft their morrows. At that time I had no clue of what the future had in store for us. It would enfold one day at a time.

With Utpal and his third degree burns the first step was to heal his wounds and get him back on his chubby feet. I remember the ordeal of his bandages and the fear we had of any infection setting in. He spent the days in my office in a little cot under my watchful eye. And day after day we witnessed the miracle of his healing. I can never forget the day when I left him under the care of one of our teachers and was told that he had eaten SIX BANANAS! I realised quite early that he was a survivor. I witnessed his first word and was there for his first step. We enrolled him in a play school and I remember dropping and picking him up every day. In our minds we had charted out a roadmap whereby we would try and secure his family and make sure he gets a sound education. But the heavens had another plan for him. A series of rather dark events led to him landing up in my home at the age of 4. He would soon go to boarding school and I would become his legal foster parent. At that time end of school days seemed truly far away. We moved from class to class with our share of hurdles that we both surmounted. And before I knew it he was in class XII. In a few days he will come home for good and his room awaits in the newly constructed house. In hindsight I realise how the heavens conjured to make all this possible as it was their plan that was unfolding, I was just the chosen lead. A new chapter of both our lives is ready to unfold. I feel a tad nervous but immensely blessed.

Babli joined Project Why in class II and was a spunky kid with stars in her eyes but a big hole in her heart that made it difficult for her to breathe. But in a halting way she voiced her dream: to be police! Upon enquiry I came to know that she was in critical need of an open heart surgery that was quite expensive. Again the heavens went to work and we found a kind hearted soul to sponsor the surgery. I thought that was the end of my role. Sometime later I was told that Babli had not been sent back to school but was tending to her father’s cart selling  knick knacks. I was livid and knew I had to intervene. Babli would join Utpal in boarding school. The rest is history.

My two little ones are all grown up now and ready to conquer the world. I do not know what awaits them but am confident that once again the Universe has plans for them. I simply need to play my role and see them fulfilled.

I feel incredibly blessed.

My dearest children

In just a few hours you will be sitting for your Board exams. Before I say anything else I want to tell you that no matter what the results are YOU ARE ALL WINNERS!

Look at where you have reached in life. From being a baby in a crib you learnt to walk, talk, read, write and went on to school where you spend long years not only learning many subjects but mastering many skills. You fell down many a times but were back on your feet to soldier on. You moved from class to class imbibing many values, learning to care for the other, to respect your elders and to tend to those younger than you. True you may have slipped sometimes but those were invaluable lessons on the path to becoming an adult. You may have encountered failure but that too was needed to know success in its true form. For success lies in the ability to rise from failure.

Today you stand tall ready to take on life. Your exam is just one more stepping stone but do not get discouraged if you are unable to score high. Marks are not what defines you my children. It is also not what you will be judged by as you take your first step into the adult world. What will hold true are the values you uphold. What will stand with you in your professional life is your creativity, your ability to think out of the box, your ability to lead others, your ability to be fair and stand by what is right. This is what will define you.

It has been a matter of pride to have you as Project Why students and I sincerely hope we have been able to instil the right values in you and help you find your true calling. You will always remain part of the Project Why family. My love and blessings are with you wherever you go.

Life waits for you and the universe has charted your course. Your exams are again just a portal you need to step trough. Believe in yourself and give the exam your best shot.

As I said earlier you are already a winner

With Love

Anou Ma’am