by Anuradha Bakshi | Jun 4, 2009 | women centre
After a long time I decided to spend a day, or let us say most of a day at the women centre. I just could not imagine that barely two years ago this place did not exist. What strikes you as you walk into the big yellow gate after having knocked at it and have someone open it for you, is a feeling of comfort and ease. It is a happy place where everyone seems to be comfortable and busy. Of course you do get your share of good whatever time of the day, but nothing more. Everyone just carries on with their task.
After a few minutes spent in the tiny office under the stairs, I decide to take a walk around the place. On the ground floor the sewing class is in full swing. A handful of ladies and young girls are busy with the chore given by the watchful teacher. No one looks up at you as they risk making a mistake. In the creche everyone is busy colouring and though you geat a big Good morning Maa’m, no one really looks up at you. The next door is closed. It is the beauty class and today is exam day. The subject bridal make up. The model one of our volunteers. They are not to be disturbed.
On the roof classes are going on but the holiday mood is palpable. Children are playing games or posing for the camera, something they all love doing. But there are some serious classes too and what never ceases to amaze me even after 9 years, is the way these exceptional kids can concentrate in spite of all the noise and hullabaloo around them.
As we walk back to the ground floor, the sewing class had ended and in the vacated place the little creche kids are having their dance session. Beaming smiles are all you need to know that all is well at the Kamala centre.
You can share some very special moments here
by Anuradha Bakshi | Nov 6, 2008 | women centre
Our women centre is quite something. Barely a year old it throbs with activity at all times. And it is not only the staff who steer it to perfection. Often is the children who take the lead and nothing can stop them.
So in the span of a short year the kids of the Kamala centre have celebrated every festival possible on their own initiative. More than the boys, it is our bunch of little femmes extraordinaires all aged between 10 and 16 who are the heart and soul of the women centre social calendar. After Independence day and Eid it was time to celebrate Diwali. Without any prompt or push they set to the task. Plays were written and rehearsed, danced composed and practices, costumes designed and decorations planned. They did it all.
It was a lovely celebration when all the children came together irrespective of their caste or creed and sand and rejoiced in unison proving to one and all that we were truly one.
I looked on with pride at my very special little women!
by Anuradha Bakshi | May 13, 2008 | women centre
Roshni has been working at our women centre since its very inception. She began has a general helper and then slowly moved on to being a creche worker. Today she even attends adult education classes.
Roshni has seven children. Hers is the story of many migrant families who leave the safety of their villages and come to the cities seeking a better future. her husband is a tailor and the family barely survives. They live in a tiny hovel where one can barely move.
When Roshni decided to put her children into a school her first option was undoubtedly the local municipal school. It was supposed to be free. But as she did not have birth certificates the school refused admission. Roshni was never told that a simple affidavit would have solved the issue.
Not one to give up she registered in some local private school – read teaching shop – where the combined fees and compulsory tuition were a whopping 4ooo rs! When we heard this we decided that we would get her children admitted to the government school and set out testing them to find the appropriate entry point. We were shocked to see that the children, the elder being in class V could barely read. Wonder what the tuition was for.
That is one chapter of Roshni’s story. There is more. Her husband was has a debilitating back problem and once again brave Roshni took him to the best hospitals and got a sound diagnosis. But, and her is the catch, one important element of the treatment was regular exercises and when we asked her whether he did do them regularly, her sheepish answer was that he never had. The reason was again a huge eye opener for all of us: their house being so tiny, there was no place to exercise. I confess I could never have thought of this in my wildest dreams.
So in true pwhy style we decided to open the centre for an hour after all regular classes so that Roshni’s husband and anyone else with similar problems can do the few stretches and other exercises that have been prescribed to them. And maybe, who knows,we might just start some yoga classes as any form of physical activity is totally absent from the lives of children and adults in slums.
Mens sana in corpose sano as the latin quote goes, a healthy mind in a healthy body. Maybe that is what is needed
by Anuradha Bakshi | May 8, 2008 | women centre
The Kamala centre is now more than six months old and much has happened within its walls. It all began as everything does with lofty ideas, impossible dreams and ambitious plans though past experience had proved that these do not get fulfilled no matter how hard you try. We were of course prepared for all course corrections and open to all suggestions and constructive criticism.
It all began when two women needed some breathing space to take stock of their lives and chart out their future at a time where they had been dealt too many blows by an unforgiving and insensitive society. I guess what we did not understand at that moment in time that once you found your feet you had to start looking for your feet and we made the mistake of planning out a long term future for them.
It is true then when things look dark and without hope, people are willing to make adjustments and come to terms with many situations. But as things start looking up and problems resolved, old habits came back to haunt and wings slowly start growing. Often their growth is slowed by a misplaced sense of indebtedness but your heart is not there and you start slipping. Just like with children that is when the wise should let the bird fly out of the coop though many do not understand this.
The last few weeks have been difficult as one of our residents, now healed of all her ailments, started feeling stifled in an environment so different form the one she had known all her life and though it was one that gave the respite she so need a year back, it was not conducive to her needs and desires now that she had found her feet. It was time to let her go.
It was also time to understand that the women centre could only be a refuge and temporary shelter for those who needed to some breathing space. True some may turn up to want to stay for long but we must realise that we cannot and should not try and hold any one back.
On the flip side the Kamala centre has gone beyond our expectations in other ways. We had imagined the children activities to be a small part of the overall project but once again reality stares at us and our education support system now till class X is choker block and even has long waiting lists. Our activities with local women are also on the rise and over and above vocational courses like beauty and stitching, we now have English classes and regular get togethers where women share all their problems and discuss matter of interests to them or us: girl child, banking, legal rights, health and hygiene, government schemes etc.
So slowly we too are finding our feet before looking for our wings!
by Anuradha Bakshi | Apr 10, 2008 | women centre
The Kamala centre is now six months old. Today over 120 children attend after school primary and secondary classes and over 50 women come for stitching and beauty classes. We intend to begin hygiene and nutrition workshops and even address some of the issues that plague urban slum women. Looks great and makes all the criteria needed to attract kudos and possible funds. However I am still not satisfied as I have been feeling that the real spirit seems lost in translation!
A recent news item and the accompanying visuals shook me out of the comfort zone I was inadvertently sinking in. A rape victim was brutalised by the rapist’s family and neighborhood and aspersions were cast on her character. She was called a drunk and that simple comment gave an uncaring society license to kill.
Just as in the past the so called law protectors made the needed noise and yet know that the noise will die and nothing will happen. We did try very hard to take up the cudgels for our dear Ghaziabad girls but the adversary was too strong and in spite of our best efforts we lost track of them. I pray that they are safe. Apologies for this digression but somehow it was necessary to jolt myself out of the dreaded comfort zone and rekindle the spirit of the woman centre.
True that sewing and beauty classes are great opportunities to empower women but they should actually simply be viewed as a mean to an end. The Kamala Centre is first of all a place where women rejected by society can find a refuge and the strength to rebuild their lives and walk in society their head held high. But more than that it is a forum where women need to learn to respect other women and stand by them no matter what their past may be. In yesterday’s incident it is women who beat the poor soul. In homes it is the mother in law that terrorises and ill treats her daughter in law. Crimes against women are too often perpetrated by women.
And therein should lie the spirit of the women centre. It has to teach women to turn the mirror towards themselves and look at reality. It has to free them of the shackles of mores and traditions and take charge of their lives and stand up for what is right. I know it is a difficult task and may look completely impossible at first. But here again we need to apply the simple resolve that made me move from a state of inactivity and ideals, to one of action and ideas: if you can change one life it would be worth it.
So to put in place the missing link and revive the soul of the women centre one has to change the attitude of one women. The rest will follow.
by Anuradha Bakshi | Dec 16, 2007 | women centre
Just two months ago it looked an impossible dream to some, an audacious step to others and an outrageous venture to yet others. But like everything else at pwhy it had to be: the women centre came into existence because two women needed our help desperately and a promise made to a little child had to be redeemed. Reasons that make scant business sense but nevertheless need to be acted. It is again all about seeing with your heart and not your eyes let alone your brain!
Come to think about it no task seems insurmountable then even though you do not quite know where help will come from when you are constantly struggling to make ends meet. And it is with impudence that you set out and nod to every need that comes your way.
Today, two months down the line the secret of the fox in the Little prince is once again vindicated. What began as a gesture of assuming responsibility has grown into a happy place filed with laughter and joy. We have had our tough moments even despairing ones but they are tiny compared to the ones filled with hope and fulfillment.
Almost 100 kids come to our pre-primary and primary classes; our beauty classes have begun in earnest and our ladies sewing circle is a proud moment where women from all caste and creed sit together sharing their lives and building dreams that somehow do not seem impossible.
You can share moments of life at the Kamala centre here
