10 Sundays ago at 10.59 am India waited with bated breath for a much hyped TV show anchored by one of Bollywood’s superstar. A clever and well planned ad campaign had preceded the show not quite revealing what it was all about. Hence everyone was intrigued and rearing to find out what Satyamev Jayate  was all bout.The atmosphere reminded us of circa 1988. Come Sunday 11am and India was glued to the box. It was Mahabharata time. Sacred in more ways than one!

The question on every one’s mind was would history repeat itself. It remains to be seen.

So 10 weeks ago SMJ episode 1 was aired. Daughters are precious was the theme of the day. Everyone was moved and angered and shared the range of emotions that were displayed in the clever script of the show. India was outraged. At least for the duration of the show. I too watched the show and shared my opinion on the subject. However without being cynical and based on my experience of more than a decade I knew that things would remain the same. It would more than one show, however star stuffed, to change things.

Yesterday’s news confirmed my worst fears! A man killed his wife for not having borne him a son. They had five daughters between the age of 3 and 13. We will all feel duly outraged for some time and forget the problem till the next aberration happens. We will then again feel outraged and then forget once again. And this will continue till the facts are set right. This will continue till the Y chromosome story is not told.

I wonder why all our family planning campaigns, our save our daughters crusades and the same have never highlighted that a woman CANNOT determine the sex of a child as she is does hot have the needed chromosome. This fact should be given prominence in every which way possible. It should appear in posters and hoardings, in street plays, in songs. The Y chromosome story needs to be told loud an clear if we want to save our girls and protect our women.

The picture you see is that of the balconies of a new housing complex in Mumbai called Aquaria Grande. These flats are for the uber rich and you guessed right have all been sold! The price in the range of 40 million rupees! This post is not meant to be a grapes are sour kind of thing. People can spend their money; I only wished they did so with a conscience. When I see balconies of hundreds of flats turned into pools of clean water I cannot but remember some worrying and disturbing statistics the first one being the 5000 children dying everyday of often water related diseases such as diarrhoea, cholera and hepatitis as millions do not have access to clean drinking water. Aquifers are being over pumped and water contaminated. There is a water crisis looming large and many states are facing severe drought conditions. Sadly we have a poor track record of management and conservation. In water starved Delhi rain water harvesting is practically non existent whereas it should be made mandatory keeping in view the construction overdrive. But every year abundant rain water is simply washed away. This has been aggravated by the obsession of cementing every nook and corner. Even trees are not spared and often wither away slowly. This was not the case some years back when we still had paved sidewalks that allowed the earth to breathe.

That water is a huge problem is a reality we cannot run away from. This is aggravated the poor management of this invaluable resource. It is time we all learnt to respect water. But that in unfortunately not the case. The easy availability of water through pipes and taps has made us forget the real issues. A friend told me once that if we still had to manually pump water and/or walk miles to access it, we would learn to respect its value. We simply take it for granted and raise a hue and cry when taps run dry. The rich simply get tankers at astronomical prices. The poor fight for it.

This picture was taken in Delhi. It shows what happens when the much awaited tanker comes in a slum area. It is nothing short of a battle royal that has tempers rising and often comes to insults and blows. Needless to say the meeker return with an empty bucket. The writing is on the wall. A recent magazine chose to entitle an article on water issues: Boiling point.  According to the article the rise in population and the depletion of ground water are the main reasons for the prevailing situation. An eminent activist hits the nail on its head when he states: There is no shortage of water in terms of rainfall. We, as a country, have failed to make use of it. But that is not all. Read on:

Policy paralysis and an appalling lack of management has turned burgeoning India into waterless, despairing India. Eight-year-old Poorni in Karnataka has decaying teeth and limbs that struggle to move due to dangerous fluoride in the groundwater. Sand contractors like Sanjay Singh Yadav, 40, make money in Bihar as the rivers dry up. Riots have broken out over borewell use, leading to death, imprisonment, deprivation and despair to families like that of Ramkumar Yadav, 60, in Chhattisgarh. Hindu Rao Hospital, one of Delhi’s leading municipal hospitals, cancelled 40 surgeries in a week between June 16 and June 23 due to lack of running water. Politicians are accused of diverting scarce water to their constituencies in Maharashtra, leaving others to fend for themselves.

The above quote explains it all. One just has to read between the lines. Much of the situation we are facing is man made and we must bear the responsibility. We all need to respect water. Think about the liters of clean water we flush everyday in our homes. I can never forget the day when we were installing a western style toilet in our women centre. A bunch of kids were hanging around and watching the operation. When the plumber walked out having finished its installation the children approached the toilet and inspected it for quite some time, their face puzzled. Then one boy exclaimed: I know what it is, it is a small well!

We all need to ponder on these words. It is time to start respecting water before it is too late. And maybe a good step would be to raise our voices against balconies that double up as swimming pools!

Akeel and Shakeel are two young lads ages 17 and 16. Were they born on the other side of the fence, they would have in swanky schools, have had loads of friends and fun. They would have watched movies in malls, and gone for treats at different places. They would have their own computers, cell phones and tablets and God knows what else. I have lost touched with the ways of the young a long while ago.

Shakeel the elder brother is in class XI. A keen student he gets good grades and comes to pwhy regularly. Nothing special one would say. But that is not where it ends. Shakeel is the sole supporter of his family: 4 siblings and his parents. His elderly father has been ailing for some time and has stopped working. His mother a simple housewife takes on some sewing work at home. Many garment manufacturers sub contract work to women at abysmal prices. You would agree that this pittance cannot feed a family, let alone educate the children, provide the medical care needed for the father etc. It is left to Shakeel to take on the responsibility. But he is one of a kind. Not wanting to give up his studies Shakeel took on a night job in a factory where he earns 5000 Rs a month. In the day he goes to school, comes to pwhy and even attends our computer classes. In between all this he catches a few hours of sleep. Thanks to his earnings his family eats and his younger siblings go to school.

Akeel the younger brother pitches in too as he helps his mom with the sewing work and support his brother’s dream: to see all the siblings educated! Wow! I just feel humbled. There are no complaints or recriminations against anyone; least of all the Almighty. There is simply a dignified acceptance of a reality that needs to be addressed and met in the best way possible without losing one’s smile.

What a beautiful lesson! All I can say is Chapeau Bas!

“People surrounded by money but unable to use it properly die of happiness thirst.” -Paramahansa Yogananda. This quote appeared on my FB page one morning. It made me smile and also wonder what the opposite of thirst would be as as I for one will die of happiness surfeit or overdose. For I for one will OD on happiness!

I have never been surrounded by money, alas, but there was a time when I had some and that is when I decided to begin pwhy. I never regretted the decision, even when things get tough and bleak, and they do more often than I would like. I guess I used my little windfall properly. But let us get serious and try and figure out what this quote truly means. To me the meaning is clear. It simply means that if you have then you must give and if you do give you get surrounded by happiness. The barter is more than fair.

There was a time when I sat on the other side of the fence and my ‘giving’ was more a kind of lip service, the politically correct thing to do. Every month I wrote my cheque dutifully and sent it to the chosen destination but in hindsight there was scant joy or happiness. It was more a kind of obligation that was steered by the head and not he heart. I truly discovered the joy of giving when pwhy begun or rather when I started dipping unabashedly into my pocket to meet the daily needs of the new baby I had brought into the world. And the more I dipped, the better I felt. Wonder why? Simply because every penny spent brought a smile on a little face. It was pure magic. And every smile warmed my heat and filled me with incredible happiness. I felt tiny and huge at the same time. And with every day my needs became smaller, my problems inconsequential, my pains and aches non-existent.

True there came a time when the pocket became too light to be dipped in and ways had to be found to replenish it so I embarked on a journey aimed at trying to get others to walk the same road. The results were mixed. Whereas on the one hand total strangers came forward, on the other people one hoped would help simply slimed away. I must admit that this is something I never understood and/or was comfortable with. It was as if I had failed to show them the worth of the equation. Maybe I should just once again share the quantum of happiness you get from giving.

We all at some time or the other feel empty in some way or the other and thus feel the need to fill this void. Some of us shop till we drop, others party, yet others opt for spiritual options and a few even get tempted by artificial paradises. The emptiness is given fancy names from depression to just the blues. Sometimes this happens after a painful loss as was my case and I too tried some of the above. But to no avail as the more you try the more empty you feel. The reason simply being that all these pursuits are self centred. My salvation came from a simple illiterate woman who told me to turn my grief to something positive. That was how pwhy came to be. The rest is history. As pwhy grew my emptiness vanished and in its place came an immense sense of well being. My world became filled with smiles and every challenge that came my way was just that: a challenge that had to be met.

This is how life has been for a decade now. No aches and pains, no blues or greys, just love and light and joy. I am ready to OD on happiness!

It was her birthday. Little Mahi was playing with her friends near her home. The little children were busy playing and laughing and no one saw the uncovered borewell and Mahi fell into it. Her little body hurled downwards and crashed 70 feet below. She was alive as her cries for help were heard by one and all. But her helpless parents and family could do nothing to help her as there was no way to reach down to her. They did the next best thing call the authorities. The police took 90 minutes to come and all the king’s men (army, metro, commandos, firemen etc) took 90 hours to bring little Mahi’s body out of the dark hole. Her soul had left for a better place much before her
broken body was recovered.

I hope death was quick to come and release her pain. I cannot begin to imagine what she must have gone through in the dark dark hole, with barely any place to breathe, let alone move, all alone and frightened. One must salute the men who braved all odds and fought night and day to bring her out. They did their best but everything conspired against them: the hard rocks that took days to break, the inhospitable terrain and lack of oxygen, the stifling heat… Yet they soldiered on. But sadly all they brought up was Mahi’s broken body.

The blame game is now on as always. The news was juicy and made good copy and TRP numbers yesterday. Today some other news will replace it and Mahi’s death will be forgotten to be remembered only when the next child falls in another uncovered borewell or drain and this will happen, there is no doubt on that. Six years ago Prince fell into a borewell and was rescued alive. Subsequent to that activists managed to secure a supreme court order that directed the administration to ensure that all such borewells and drains were suitably covered. But nothing happened. Wells were dug with impunity and alacrity and still are. It is all a catch 22 situation. The administration fails in providing water. People find their own ways. The authorities turn a blind eye and  extend greedy palms and the game goes on. You see everyone is happy: the ones who get the much needed water and the ones who can line their bottomless pockets. No one is the wiser till another child falls. How many children will have to die before someone takes action. No one knows.

In more ways than one, ours is not a land for children. No one cares for them. The proof: 5000 of them die every day. Their schools have no roof, they are used and abused. The list is endless. We remain mute at best or megalomaniac at worst. The proof: Aquaria Grande the new housing complex in our commercial capital that boasts of balcony swimming pools in a land where children die because of water borne diseases as they do not have access to safe drinking water or simply by falling in an uncovered borewell!

Has our conscience gone AWOL?

PS A friend pointed me to a wonderful idea to cover these deadly pits: plant trees! She mooted the thought way back in 2009 but found no takers. Maybe it is time to look at this again and find a way.

You sometimes do not realise that your kids have grown, particularly when they are of the special kind. I must admit rather sheepishly, that ever since they special kids moved into their new space on the third floor of the building opposite ours I have been somewhat absent from their lives. The reason is I find myself citing is of course my creaking knees. A rather pitiful reason I must confess particularly when I think of our special kids who make the climb with a smile whether they are a tad wobbly (Umesh) or walk on their hands (Preeti)! The truth is I have just been lazy.

So a few days back when I did make the trip to the special class it was an eye opened in more ways than one. First and foremost I realised how much I missed seeing the lovely smiles and hearing the heartwarming greetings of these lovely souls and more than that how much it meant to me as I suddenly felt uplifted and revived. This has not happened for a long time. Seeing these special kids was a treat I had simply denied myself for too many days.

Another thing hit me that afternoon as I watched the children busy in their art and craft activities. I realised that many of them were all grown up. Yes more than a decade had passed and though some still looked small, they were now young adults. And time has come for us to accept them as such. My mind went on overdrive as I started making plans for them in my head, keeping every one’s likes and abilities in mind. These children were now adults and should be entering the working world, never mind their disability. The older girls could start marketing their weaving. Why not make table mats and bathroom mats out of waste cloth? And why not start a small in house catering service that could maybe one day mutate into a proper catering service.

It did not take any time to set things in motion. The very next day the older girls and Anurag who loves cooking set up the pwhy special cafe. The first task was to find clients! And that was easy as many of the staff were delighted by the idea of having hot home made food. The students with the help of their teacher made a menu and took orders. A shopping list was made and the needed ingredients bough and lo and behold the very next day 3 warm lunches were made and served on time. The clients were thrilled and orders placed for the next day. Things will get a little time to settle down but I am sure than in a month or so these fabulous young cooks will be able to cater to larger numbers. They have proved beyond doubt that they are ready to become business men and women.

But catering is not their only venture. The girls have been learning weaving for  quite some time now and can make stunning pieces from discarded cloth. We are now thinking of getting this activity organised and making table mats, floor mats and wall hangings and try and find markets for them. The weaved pieces are really bright and colourful and could make lovely gifts for one and all. I hope many of you will support this venture.

The older boys will be making newspaper mats for our creche children. Many of the boys have limited motor skills but with supervision and help they will be able to make these mats that are used by our tiny students at lunch time. We are also thinking of teaching them how to make paper bags.

For me this week has been very special. To see that our children have now grown into responsible adults in spite of their challenges is precious. I know they will make us proud. They never fail to!