by Anuradha Bakshi | Dec 20, 2005 | Uncategorized
it was a chilly afternoon as we set out to vist nanhe’s home. we needed to assess the situation and see what was needed to make his return from hospital as comfortable as possible. we locate his mother’s cart and she guided us to her home. we had expected a small jhuggi but this was more like a box where a cot took almost all the place – remember five people lived here, nanhe being the youngest – the place was as tidy as such a place can be, with a small electric stove and all that was essential to subsist. we made a mental note of what would be needed as we sat on the cot..
the dampness of the tiny room made the cold even more biting and quite honestly we were hoping for a cup of tea.. nanhe’s mom had scurried out we thought to get some milk.. we were taken a back when she returned with bottles of pepsi… and looked at each other in dispair.. knowing that we would have to gulp the chilled bottles seeped in the gratitude and love of this brave mother who probably felt thata mundane cup of tea was not god enough for us..
well you see this was urban india and nanhe’s mom had to show that she had learnt urban ways.. in her village we would have probably been given sweet and hot tea..
we drank the urban treat as refusing it would have been hurting her feelings..
Oh darling yeh hai India..
by Anuradha Bakshi | Dec 19, 2005 | Uncategorized
Wonder who this is…
This is our little babli’s family… her father and her little sister.. the ones she has to mother despite a hole in her heart..
But there are no options.. babli’s father who is 35 years older than her mom, is asthmatic and cannot work.. or does not want to. Santosha her mom slogs in a factory for long hours and babli is the one who takes charge of things at home.. True she is not the eldest child. She has a big brother but then he is a boy and enjoys certain privileges: he can play with friends and go to school, in a nutshell be a child..
This is the plight of many little girls who are deprived of their childhood by the realities of life in urban slums where there no extended families. The fact that babli has a severe heart condition makes the matter just that more poignant…
read more about babli:
babli’s world
babli.. a tiny woman of substance
Life on the planet is born of woman
let alone she may die
by Anuradha Bakshi | Dec 19, 2005 | Uncategorized
nanhe’s smile has moved many friends.. and yes he is an amazing child and we are very blessed to have him with us.
He has showed us the true meaning of hope and more than that his love for life does makes us all wonder about the total emptiness of our own lives…
I have often wondered why God, if there si one, sends such souls into this world.. many answers come to my mind but above all I feel that somehow these lovely children who bear their suffering with such dignity are there to help us unearth parts of us which seem to have got lost in the recess of our minds and souls…
The smile in the picture was nanhe’s way of telling me this morning as he set out for another series of painful tests, that all was well on planet earth and that he was ready to take on the day with courage.. his way of requesting me and others like me, not to pity him or feel sorry..
Ever since we began our work, it is the children of the special section who have given me the strength and the determination to carry on, no matter what.. they have been beacons of light and proved that no situation was ever desperate enough to want to give up. This motley crowd of simple souls with different abilities are examples of compassion, acceptance, cooperation and love.. a true celebration of diference..
How small we feel compared to them…
by Anuradha Bakshi | Dec 17, 2005 | Uncategorized
In our fight for survival, we put up an adoption plan whereby we seek kind hearts to ‘adopt’ the nine sections which make pwhy, each with its dreams, its hopes, its aspirations…
I have many times, maybe even too many for some, shared my own dreams for pwhy. I try with passion to defend its very spirit which can be summed up in the words: a mater of the heart.
In our dark times, many well wishers have tried to convince me to give up my quest for caring hearts and accept the more conventional way of institutional and impersonal funding.. I must confess that even if I sometimes nodded in agreement, my heart refused to follow and I lay in the dark of the night looking for a sign to vindicate my stand..
Last week another volley of mails was sent asking friends to come together and help us. I must admit that I got my share of emails telling me to change my ways, but I kept my fingers crossed and waited for a sign to show me I was right and this morning it happened as one of our centre got adopted by a old friend and supporter.. and I heaved a sigh of relief..
This friend of why is someone I have never met, someone who has never been to pwhy.. but to come back to my favourite parable, she is one who understood the secret reveald to St Exupery’s Little Prince by an untamed Fox, someone who can see with her heart..
by Anuradha Bakshi | Dec 16, 2005 | Uncategorized
“I will donate for the child if you guarantee he will live” were the harsh words that I heard in the dead of a night when we were looking for funds for Raju our first heart surgery. This followed an appeal on TV and was one of the numerous calls that were made on that September night.
I just answered as sweetly as I could that I could not even guarantee that I would be alive…Raju was operated upon, is now back in school and a fine boy at that.
I had forgotten this incident till today as we sat in the weak afternoon sun, talking about Nanhe and his forthcoming operation and the unecessary delays as the child is in great pain. A few friends were also present and we shared our helplesness as we foresaw no real future for this severly handicapped child, who cannot walk or talk and is dependent on a single parent who can barely support her family. I had thought that the friends present would come forward to help Nanhe and I must confess I was a little taken aback.. till I realised that people do not invest in a child who has no real tomorrows…
Yet Nanhe wants to live.. and he shows it in so many ways.. never complains.. always smiles.. even though all conspires against him – he fell of his mom’s cart and has four stitches -. He even has friends now and is happy…
Now the question is: he is worth investing in.. and what one can one do..
The answer is simple: fill his life with as much happiness as we can. Get the minimum surgery needed to make him pain free, get him diapers – they cost a bomb – so that he retains his dignity and can be taken out to parks, and other places… we know that his life will be short, and that is the best for him.. but it is still a life, a life that is worth investing in..
And let me tell you, his life has a purpose.. it shows us that life no matter how wreteched is to be celebrated and lived to its very end..
And if you need any proof, just look at his smile….
by Anuradha Bakshi | Dec 13, 2005 | Uncategorized
This is Babli’s world..
It is rich in some things and terribly lacking in others. It is filled with smiles and love, courage and determination, dreams and hope, prayers and belief.. all things intangible yet precious. Bablis’ home is tiny, maybe as small as a bathroom or a storeroom in upmarket areas. It has one rickety charpoy, not enough bedding to keep this family of five warm on what is said to be the coldest night in years. A few pots and pans in a corner, a few empty containers making you wonder what dinner will be tonight.
But life goes on in this home, and traditions are respected, the freshly painted walls bear witness to this: Diwali just went by. It is probably in this space that Santosha, Babli’s mom whispered her desperate prayer, that Babli expressed her silent desire to be a ‘police’ – , in this very space that the little family gets together at night to share the happenings of the day gone by. At present the topic must be Babli’s imminent heart surgery as prayers have been heard and dreams have taken the first step towards realisation…
The smiles of the children’s face are proof of the strange and almost incomprehensible fact that this is a happy place. For Babli it is a home she is proud of and from where she draws strength.
Yes Babli’s operation will happen soon.. it is just a matter of settling a few hurdles.. another miracle is in the making.. but that is not why I write this post.
I write this post to dispel what many of my peers think about what they callously call ‘jhuggiwallahs“, and quickly qualify with a string of negative traits. No, all jhuggiwallahs are not thiefs or crooks. They are just like us and live with dignity and courage in conditions many of us cannot begin to fathom. Babli is the fourth heart surgery, and we have supported each of the families. An operation of this magnitude often entails a parent having to take leave and we have have helped them with food and basic amenities. Let me assure you that once the child is through, we have never been harassed for help. The only thing we have received is an embarassing amount of gratitude.
I was hurt, angry and ultimately very sad by the outburst of a visitor who was witnessing our planning for babli operation. She cried out: “do not give them food for more than two days, all jhuggiwallahs are crooks and they will harass you for more”.
No ma’am, they are not crooks, they are human beings just like us…
