the only way to go

by Anuradha Bakshi | Dec 19, 2008 | manu

Yesterday our four little foster care kids celebrated their first annual day in their little prep school. While the three older ones were dancing, little Aditya was an elephant in a Panchatantra tale. Babli, Nikhil, Vicky and Aditya are incredible kids. For the past 8 months they have been living with their very special pals Manu, Champa and Anjali. And they all are truly a terrific seven!

A year back they lived dreary lives and barely knew each other. In a few months they will take their first step in brand new world when they join little Utpal in his boarding school where a a whole new world await them.

These four kids have done us proud. They have secured excellent marks in their terminal examinations and have truly walked the talk! Yesterday, as I watched them get ready for their big show my heart filled with pride. How little it took to change the world of a child. Their willingness to accept new ways and excel in them is truly touching. They seem to know intuitively that what is happening to them is special.

My thoughts go back to the days when the whole programme had been put in question as support we thought we had secured was withdrawn without an explanation. I remember the sleepless nights I spent wondering how to salvage the programme at least for these four kids. I recall the reactions I got from those I approached for help. To many, giving quality education to slum children was anathema. And yet I could not send back these kids to their homes; I could not take back dreams that their parents had conjured.

Thank God, there were friends who felt the way I did and soon a wonderful network was created to try and help these children. Asha Seattle and Asha Canada have adopted this project and others have promised to help.

One must remember that this is a long haul. The children have to be able to complete their education that they are just beginning. It is also a long term commitment and one does not know what awaits us. It is not simply a matter of funds, for the next decade or so these children will depend on us at every step. One will have to be there at each PTM, smooth bruised egos , laud every achievement, chide when needed and heal every hurt. We too embark on a new journey, one we know will be filled with wonderful moments but also challenging ones.

My mind again travels back to the time where I first laid eyes on each of them. The day Babli told me herself that she needed an operation but that the family did not have the money. And then long after the operation the terrible day when I found out that Babli had stopped going to school. My mind also goes back to the very first time little Aditya walked into our lives a lost child with his huge eyes filled with questions. or the day we first moment I saw Vicky in the arms of his mother as we visited his family? Children whose dreams had been put on hold by seemingly insurmountable circumstance. And yet the god of lesser beings had his own plan. One that took many twists and turns but ultimately brought these children together under one roof and salvaged all dreams just as he had done for little Utpal.

In a few months these children will fly to another coop. We will miss them but for them it is the only way to go.

Could you live here

by Anuradha Bakshi | Dec 15, 2008 | manu

Last week the world celebrated the 60th anniversary of the signing of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. On that day the Alliance Francaise had a special celebration. Three graffiti artists from France made live paintings while musicians performed. Pwhy was invited and we had set up an information table and made a power point presentation that was looped through most of the evening bringing the smiles of the pwhy children to warm the chilly evening.

I had to make a speech and while writing it I had to do two things: read the Human Rights Declaration again and then link it to our work. While doing so I realised how privileged we were as most of our rights were protected all the time, something we were barely aware of and simply took for granted. To us human rights was what we defended from the comfort of an armchair or at a cocktail party when some terrible violation had taken place in some remote part of the country or the world. We were simply oblivious to the fact that we belonged to the chosen few whose rights were protected by birth.

As I perused the list of articles I realised that many of the rights we took for granted, were actually violated for many around us though we remained comfortably oblivious to the fact. I sat a long time wondering what I would say in my speech and realised that in hindsight pwhy had somehow been a journey of restoring violated human rights. It all began with Manu. Had he not been subjected to the violation of each and every one of his human right? And even today, 8 years down the line though we may have helped restore some of his rights we have not been able to give him back his right of being a citizen of a country as all our efforts have been in vain. A classic catch 22 situation.

There have been many cases where our efforts has helped restore some usurped or hijacked human right often quite unwittingly and yet there are moments when even our inured minds are jolted beyond words. Recently a visit to little Radha’s home shook us out the complacent attitude we seemed to have adopted. The picture you see is that of her house ( the one on the left of the picture is hers). One her mother has to pay 4oo rs a month for over and above the three meals a day she has to provide to her landlord. The house could best be described as a kennel! Made of bricks and mud with a paltry tin roofing this minute dwelling was home to two adults and four children. It is was where they slept, ate, cooked, played, laughed, cried in a word: lived. Is is where little Radha sheltered her brittle bones. No wonder she broke them with clockwork regularity.

Today it lies locked as the family has gone to the village to perform the last rites of the father. When they come back they would have to resume their pathetic survival in this flimsy space. If all goes well this will not be the case as we hope to be able to give the little family shelter in our women’s centre.

But across our city replete with its sparkling malls and sprawling homes there are many such hovels where people live, people that make our lives a little easier. When I hear the constant references in speeches made by those who rule this city to making Delhi a world class city for the famed forthcoming sports extravaganza, my blood curdles. Can one even consider making the city a better place if there are people living in such conditions. And what is worst is that many such dwellers have voters ID cards! Hence they are not as invisible as one would like to think. It is just that in our country one does not visit the homes of those who work for us. Maybe one should begin to.

No one can be allowed by any self respecting society to live in a space where you cannot even stand. Please look at this picture again

Could you live here?

where children dare to dream

by Anuradha Bakshi | Aug 13, 2005 | manu

“Where children dare to dream.”

Those were the words that came instinctively to my mind when I designed the first Project Why brochure. They have remained there ever since—unnoticed, perhaps, but somehow quietly guiding us in our work.

So when our friends from Japan decided to celebrate the Tanabata festival at Project Why, we were thrilled. Even though the celebration was somewhat delayed, it was an important step in our exchange programme with Japan.

Naoko and her formidable gang of lovely ladies arrived carrying huge bamboo stems. Every child wrote a wish on a small, colourful piece of paper, which was then tied to the bamboo.

I decided to give a set of wishes to the children in our special section. This is what they wrote:

Umesh, who can barely walk, wants to fly an aeroplane.

Preeti, who has never felt loved, wants to be a mother.

Soni, who is always in love, wants to dance with Salman Khan.

Anurag, living within the confines of autism, wants to drive a car.

Shalini, a girl with Down syndrome, wants to be a doctor.

Pinki, who has severe intellectual disabilities, wants to be a policewoman.

Ruchi, who suffers from a severe neurological condition, wants to be a teacher.

Manu—yes, our very own Manu—wants to be a monitor.

And Rajni simply wants to eat delicious food.

Read those dreams again.

They are a true reflection of the lonely lives these children lead. And yet, despite everything, they dream.

Yes, they have dreams.

The very children we sometimes feel uncomfortable with. The children who are cast aside by their own families. The children who may not receive proper food, let alone love.

They have dreams.

In the five years since Project Why began, this was the first time I felt that I had truly achieved something.

Yes. Project Why is a place where all children can dare to dream.

when today is over…

by Anuradha Bakshi | Jun 26, 2005 | manu

This is nanhe, nanhe means small or tiny.. he came to us a year ago, could not walk, was incontinent, and barely spoke… we put in with the creche children were he spent time on a chair looking at others ..

A few weeks back, we decided to ‘promote’ him to the special section.

Nanhe loved this change as somehow started interacting with his peer group and learning new things: puzzles, hesitant steps, smiles and sounds, sharing his food, anything to say ‘main hoon na‘! ‘hey, here i am, look at me‘ and of course the unexpressed words only audible if you listen with your heart: please love me!

All seemed well on planet why.. till an ugly incident occured bringing a simple question to my mind: when today is over for nanhe.. what about tomorrow.

One of the daily tasks of the special section is to give manu a bath. Manu, the one for whom project why saw the light.. Manu the child like adult, the child of the lesser god, the one with all the labels saying ‘wrong’ stuck on his head, and Manu’s bath, not a pleasant task i agree, is such an issue, but one that brings out the ugly side of India.

There are those who accept this task with love, those who do it as an act of charity, those that do it because it needs to be done and then recently some that refused.. citing all kinds of unacceptable reasons…

When logic and humanity did not work, the axe had to fall and it has on two persons. For us it was a simple matter of fairness and equality: what is right for one has to be for all..

Threats have ensued, threats of violence, threats of legal action and we will take them head on, as the question does not stop with manu, when today is over.. other boys in need of care and love and help would have grown up.. and the solution does no lie in employing a person of the risgh caste, age, sex, creed to do tasks one does not want to do.. creating barriers that seem to difficult to bring down today..

if tomorrow has to come, then barriers have to be broken with the heart!